Western Washington University Top Questions

After being exposed to the dreadlocked, mason jar toting, pierced "Bellinghamsters" that attend my school, I would have to tell myself to chop off my hair and pierce my septum sooner. For the duration of high school, and especially as a senior, I felt the need to fit in with my peers and in doing so, repressed my interests and personality. Since arriving at Western Washington University, I have had such a weight lifted off of my shoulders and now work to only meet my own expectations for how I portray myself. I feel much more like myself and am more comfortable in my own skin because of this release from the expectations of my peers. I no longer strive to please others; I am not quite sure if the weight has been lifted off of my shoulders because of this, or because I cut off my long locks as a farewell to high school. I think it may be a bit more of the latter.

Never allow yourself to feel totally comfortable. Comfort is a sign that you're doing something wrong, that you're missing an opportunity to enrich yourself. On that thought, enrich yourself out of curiosity and interest, not some abstract moral compulsion you feel. Your instincts are trustworthy, and you're right to think that you won't become "corrupted," whatever that word means. You are your only judge. It's a delicate line to walk, following what you love and want, but never staying comfortable. It means letting your friends talk you in to going dancing, doing horribly, and going back next week because you had a good time. It means kissing the girl, getting shoved away, and laughing it off. It means crying, yes, you can do it. Remember when you and Dad joked about how shoveling the drive or doing miserable things build character. This is your last chance to build yourself before you're out in the world, and it won't be miserable, but it won't be comfortable. You've been good at being safe and warm. Now go get a little frost bite. And love it all the while.

Realize that every little thing matters. But don't just realize that, realize why. The smallest tasks all lead up to two large benefits: one, you showcase yourself as a skilled individual by your positive results, and two, you are a more skilled individual because of the challenges you took on a conquered. On that note, do not shrink away from challenges. Do not be afraid of what you can't do, be afraid of thinking that there is something you cannot accomplish. Don't sell yourself short, and expect greatness. The greatest enemy lying between you and the goal is you. If you can break free from your underwhelming preconceptions of yourself, if you can push yourself beyond comfort, and try yourself in the flames, you might be surprised by what you find and by what you become. The crucible of academia is priceless and powerful beyond words, able to turn a fool into a scholar and coward into a brave young man, able to face the world and all its challenges.

Dear High School Zellie, This is where your life begins. There are several things that you will have to do on your own, but you were always independent, so I believe in you. At first, you'll miss home, but by the end of the year, you'll never want to leave. First things first, exercise. Why? Because the dining hall is open to you 24 hours a day, and the "Freshman 15" is real. Enough said. Second of all, shift your focus from thinking about boys to putting in work. When I say work, I mean 5-7 hours into studying. I know how you value sleep, but staying up will be worth your perfect scores on those quizzes/exams. Lastly, and most importantly, don't forget who you are, and whose you are. You are God's beautiful creation. God made you a light for the darkness. Not only are you there to be educated, but you were made to build and change your community. Hold on to your faith, because there is nothing greater than your relationship with the ultimate provider. Other than that, you will be just fine. I think the world of you. Good luck.

Hey babe, I know you think you're ready for college and in reality, you are. You did everything everyone tells you to do; took all the honors classes and got straight A's. Academically speaking, you're on top of the college world. There's one thing all those people forget to tell you though. Once you get to college and you're settled in with all your books and classes, make sure you make connections. College can get pretty lonely if all you have is your studies for company. The courses and homework are important but they won't mean a thing if you are so unhappy you feel like you can't make it through the day. Take it from someone who knows; a dorm room is a pretty tiny place to stay all day. So don't make the same mistakes I did. Instead, make friends and enjoy the world around you. Ask yourself if you're really happy doing whatever it is you're up to. Of course, study your heart out and be the amazing scholar I know you are. Just make sure you remember how many people in the world love you too.

There are many things I would say to my high school self. I would tell her that things get better. The awkwardness of adolescence fades and is replaced with experience, wisdom, and above all, increased confidence. I came from an economically disadvantaged family. Education was not emphasized. We were not pushed to achieve and poor grades were rarely punished if acknowledged at all. Likewise, we were rarely rewarded for good grades or accomplishment. This lack of inspiration made the pressures of high school more difficult. I wanted to do well for fear of being shamed by peers and disappointing teachers, but I didn’t have any support at home. I was plagued by a lack of confidence. I never felt smart. I found assignments daunting and had anxiety about doing the work. I didn’t begin college until I was in my mid-twenties and at thirty four I’m still working toward my first degree, but I will accomplish my goal. If I could speak to that young, awkward, insecure girl I was in high school, I would tell her she IS smart. She CAN accomplish goals. She WILL achieve. She will simply do it at her own pace.

Computer science is your destiny, don’t switch majors four times before coming back to CS. Don’t waste your time on community college; your credits will be useless. Go straight to university. Don’t go to Christian school. You’re going to have a lot of relatives die. It’s okay, it happens to everyone and it has to happen someday, you will get over it. You’re going to have your heart broken by several girls, and you’re going to break a girl’s heart. You will think that life is ending and you’ll never love again and you’ll never be able to forgive yourself for hurting, but it’s okay. You will pick yourself up dust yourself off, and learn from it. You weren’t meant to marry her. Love will come again and when you meet her, you’ll know. You will be engaged by 2014. Study more. Party less. When you apply yourself you are capable of so much more than you can possibly imagine right now. Learn. Grow. Don’t stress out too much (even though I know you will) and don’t forget to stop and smell the flowers.

I spent high school trying to blend in. Standing out was scary. I was not ready. I was not "standing out" material. So I put myself into a box. I was me only with my close friends. The rest of the world saw the safe and quiet and reserved Emma. Not that I was a wooden post. Sometimes sarcasm and laughter would emerge, but often, funny comments went unsaid. I hid my quirky sense of fashion. Quirky attracts attention. I would always be the one who would watch the action, but would never be in on the action. And I was selling myself short. I had stuffed my soul into a box all by myself. And there is such a bigger plan for me. One which involves boldness and love and laughter and grace. So this is me telling my high school self, who’s trying to just blend in; don't do it. Remember that you are beautifully unique. Stuffing yourself into a box will only hide this from a world that desperately needs daring individuals to share some love and grace. So laugh loudly, wear those funky shoes, and hold that head up high. Let’s be brave.

There is one thing I’d like to go back and pound into my high school self’s thick, stubborn head. BE PROACTIVE. In every way. Apply for admission early, apply for scholarships and financial aid early, apply for housing early…apply for everything EARLY. This time last year, I was under the impression that I had more money for school this year that I actually did, and by the time I realized I was wrong it was less than a month before move-in and the deadlines for scholarships and such for this year had all long since passed. I hadn’t applied for very many scholarships; I didn’t think I needed to. My parents and I are paying for that now, quite literally. I also made the mistake of not registering for fall quarter in the summer. I got all the classes I wanted, but…all the used textbooks had been sold by the time I knew what classes I was taking so I had to buy all new ones. Again, being proactive would have let me avoid spending $500 on books I’ll probably never look at again. So basically, DO EVERYTHING AS EARLY AS POSSIBLE.

Do not get married at this age. Graduate with your class. I know that your home life is extremely painful and unhappy, but I will help you to leave. You can come stay with me to finish, without finishing this will follow you and affect you by convincing yourself that you do not have the ability to commit to finishing something you have started. You must belive that you are stronger than you believe. You are an intelligent individual, and you will find what you need. I know a few more months seems like an eternity to you, but you will survive. Do not despair.